Yesterday was Emma’s 7th birthday.
First of all, I cannot believe that she is 7 years old.
I woke up excited to celebrate her, how could I not be excited to celebrate that sweet and sassy little thing?
However, I also woke up anxious…at 5:15am. UGH!
I really wasn’t sure where the anxiety was coming from…I assumed that it was just the fact that it was her birthday, and my Mama brain was putting way TOO much pressure on myself to make her birthday super special. Goodness, the pressure! (We do it to ourselves Mamas.)
At 5:15 am, I decided it was best that I sit with Jesus and I am so thankful that I did.
The Lord keeps bringing Psalm 51 to my heart these day, so I started there. The entire Psalm is so good, but it is verse 12 that keeps popping out.
“Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit to sustain me.”
I just love ALL the promises in this!
“Restore to me the joy of your salvation…”
Wow! A promise of having joy (even when I’ve lost it) because He is the restorer. Not because I “choose joy” or because I “counted my blessings” or “changed my perspective”. All of these are wonderful habits and very beneficial, but they require ME to do something. And this verse in Psalm 51 only requires me to trust in HIS provisions. Joy! Restore that to me Lord; because of your salvation! In these words, David really does understand his own lack of…everything. And like David, I lack! And I need His salvation.
“…and grant me a willing spirit…”
Then we have the second part of the verse which is a request for a willing Spirit- not because of what I’ve done, but because He granted it to me! Another simple request. “God, grant me a willing spirit”. Other versions says “uphold me with a wiling spirit”. Again, here we see David looking to the Giver for what he needs…willingness.
“…to sustain me.”
Oh the humanity of need these words carry.
God, sustain me.
Being fully sustained- not because of me, but because of His great love, mercy, and power.
We’ve got this! Not because of us, but because of Jesus.
Yesterday was full of anxiety. One of the cars we have didn’t start and Josh missed Emma’s talent show.
Joy, Lord, give me joy!
We got the big van stuck in the mud in the yard (we’ve had more than enough rain these days) trying to jump off the car.
Lord, sustain me.
I had a really hard conversation at a school about one of my children struggling academically.
Jesus, grant me a willing spirit!
We then forgot the coupon book at the house and I missed more than 40 minutes of fun at the trampoline park.
“Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit to sustain me.”
However, at the end of the day, when I laid down my head to sleep, I remembered His words and gave thanks. I still had my joy, salvation, and a willing spirit because He sustained me way beyond of what I could have done in myself.
Emma Joy had a great birthday, the cars are all running, and Josh was able to see Emma at her 2ndperformance of the talent show.
Praying that all of us will look to the only real Sustainer this Christmas season!
We’ve got this! Not because of us, but because of Jesus.
