April Fools Folly
It is a well known fact among our friends and family to stay clear of the Hepner house on the first of April.
Over the years, there have been messes made and gags had that would make the most laid-back person cringe.
Cups of water falling from opening doors, scary pictures taped in toilets, shaving cream on faces, lotion on doorknobs are all common place most years.
We have even been a part of pouring colored confetti into the air conditioner vents of a truck. When they crunk the vehicle, you can imagine the surprise as thousands of tiny pieces of paper filled the air...I am sure even today there is some floating around.
Shower heads have been laced with chicken broth cubes, shoes have been filled with marbles, sugar has been replaced with salt, and oil has created slippery surfaces. Most April fools mornings I am greeted with cups, full of water, turned upside down all over the kitchen counters...oh, and not to mention rubber bands wrapped around kitchen sink sprayers.
We have posted that I was pregnant (most people believe that one) and that we were expecting twins...all thanks to my wonderful husband, of course...who has now turned this terrifyingly unexpected day into my oldest son's field day.
Dayne is now 18. And has officially become the master of the April fools day. He got me. Hands down he pranked me the worst anyone has ever pranked me before.
However, before I get to his prank, let me just recap my day for you as I do have seven spawns of Josh Hepner.
I woke up, stumbling down the stairs, on my normal path to the coffee pot. I opened the hatch to replace the filter to get my first initiation to the day. A printed picture of Macaulay Culkin's infamous "Home Alone" face caused me a little jolt, jump, then a smile...today is the day, I thought. (Funny side note: Abigail and Darcie later told me that the night before they wanted to print a scary picture to tape around the house but were afraid to google search "scary face" late at night all by themselves...smart girls...so they settled for "Home Alone".) Ha!
The same picture greeted me on the toilet seat...didn't really phase me at that point. Once I saw the lid down, I knew something was up.
Fast forward to shower time...they painstakingly removed all of the lids on the shampoo and body wash bottles, covered it with saran-wrap, and then replaced the lids. Basically, when you try to wash your hair or dispense soap, nothing happens. It took me too long to understand why my soap was stuck...good one, I thought, that wasn't too bad...I hope that is all.
I gave credit where credit was due...affirmed that I had been fooled and went about my day.
Josh and I went on a "quarantine date" where we ordered food to our office. It was a blessing to just get out of the house. While sitting there, I called out, "food is here", causing him to jump up...just to yell "April fools"...lame, I know. But as Josh often says, I am bad at being bad. At least it made me laugh.
It wasn't until I get home that the real "fun" began.
I was minding my own business, cooking dinner, when I checked my email. I have been waiting for some things with my book to finish up, so I check my email too often these days.
Immediately, there was an email that jumped out...from the advisor at Dayne's school. Let me emphasize that it was from an email address that I receive emails from often. Enjoy taking a second to read it...
Let me just tell you that my heart stopped beating and I became short of breath. My thoughts went all over the place and my stomach knotted. Once I finally read over the email...twice...and gathered enough nerve to go get Josh, I was about to pass out. I pulled Josh into the pantry and watched his eyes scan the words, his face went a little pale and then red...that was when the tears ensued.
I am not talking a tear rolling down my face, I am talking a WAIL...and full out LOUD ugly cry!
I was so MAD! I was so SAD! I was so DISAPPOINTED! It was one of the worst feelings! AND I let it out!
Maybe I needed a good cry! We ARE in the middle of a global pandemic. Maybe it was just the excuse I needed. But let me tell you, I let it go. LOUDLY and unashamedly.
Meanwhile, Josh became suspicious, being the prankster himself.
"Kristen, maybe it's not real, it IS April fools day," he said.
"How could it not be REAL? Look at the email address," I cried.
By this time, Dayne knew something was up.
Apparently Josh demanded, "tell me this is a joke."
Dayne tried to play it off, but once he heard his mother losing her mind, he started to feel bad.
RIGHTFULLY SO!!!! I hope he still feels bad!
"Mom! It's just a joke! April fools!" he stuttered.
It was like waking up from a bad dream that I couldn't shake. I went on crying for at least a half hour. Just the thought of that happening still makes my heart hurt.
I have to admit in the end, that I've officially been pranked. April fools was a success in the minds of my family.
Next year, I WILL get my revenge. I went to bed with a pounding headache from my emotional breakdown...after I brushed my teeth with toothpaste that someone laced with CLOVER essential oil causing my entire face to go numb.
Until next year...
Check out Dayne's TikTok videos of his nonsense by clicking on the following pictures...there are 2 videos...Part 1 and Part 2...